Missing Him Now

I still miss that person. I cannot understand myself. I know it is wrong and I cannot go back to the past anymore. I know he is a completely different person now. He is not the person that he used to be.

I cannot hide it anymore. I am sad. Sad because I lost him. The good person in him. Now, who I am talking with is totally different person. He is so different. I miss the person that he used to be. The person I have learned to love.

There's no turning back. He had his faults too. And I have mine. I know he does not deserve me in any way but I still miss him. I miss him a lot. I may be smiling but deep inside I am feeling this pain of losing that person. The person who used to greet me in the morning, the one who made me feel so special. I miss him.

Yet, I have to let go. Maybe this is just the consequence of all the selfishness that I made and did before. And I still have to live with this pain until it will completely go away.

If only I could turn back the hands of time, I would have done things differently. I would have made sounder and better decisions. I am in pain now. I cannot hide the sadness anymore. I have to face the truth. That I am sad. By God's grace, I'll make it through. The experience somehow brought out the worst and best in me.

I still miss him but I must let go, must and will move on...