As He Is

As he is...

I will accept him as he is.

I have been setting my expectations and standards too high.

Somehow, I have been pressuring him albeit subtly to be the ideal man that I have always wanted to have. Or the person that I have always wanted to be.

I have been placing him under pressure to be the person that I could engage intellectual and high-society talks with when in fact, he could not.

And probably could never be.

Not because he does not want to but to be practically honest he is not wired to be that way.

He is the type of person who only wants a very simple life. A simple existence as long as he is doing well, he is not sick, he eats enough to survive, he works and he sleeps. Of course he has his social life, he has his social circle and interests as well but not like mine.

In fact, we have very few things in common.

He is not into music; music has been a second life to me. He is not into books though he reads from time to time but not like the ones I enjoy reading. Reading for him is like a necessity; for me it's both a need and want.

He is not into paintings, maybe he has not yet heard about Van Gogh, Degas and Monet and classical music sounds boring to him when in fact all of these just stimulate my mind and my being.

We are indeed two worlds apart, so polarized yet so united.

Why? Because we cannot be without the other.

He takes good care of me. He understands my tantrums and puts up with my emotional outburst. He is the only one who I want to be with for he knows exactly how to handle my semi-volatile nature.

He is the only who can accept and understand me well. Though he may not become the intellectual giant that I dream of him to be.

He loves me. For him that's simple. Yet, I think I am just making things so overly complicated.

I don't know. I pray we can work things out. We can patch up our differences until we meet halfway.

I should not depend on him completely for my own happiness and fulfillment. I think I should take off the pressure of him.

Maybe, this is one way I can fully understand what love is all about. We don't have to be so alike.

We only have to understand each other and meet in the middle.